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Monday, December 12, 2011


I am old enough to know that HEALTH is THE MOST IMPORTANT FACTOR in life. Without health I have a very compromised quality of living. I am very, very lucky to be part of a blended family: the divorced & remarried families on both my son & his wife's side harmoniously celebrate holidays & share events together. It is something my partner, Norman, and I both wanted. But we split when our son, Jason, was only two. The separation was wrenching & contentious, filled hurt, anger, rage & hostility. After 5 years our chill had softened enough for him to, very considerately, sit me down to tell me he was remarrying Roberta. Further healing came with father-time and Roberta & her family's unusually hospitable welcoming me into their family. Her father, when he was alive, once called to make sure I was coming to his wife's birthday. Her brother & I share political connections & email conversations. Roberta and I have grown closer over the years, as we have "girl" talk & email about our sons, grandsons and family. She has become more like a sister. Two weeks ago after an MRI prompted by 6 weeks of excruciating back pain, w/ no relief, Roberta was shockingly diagnosed with metastasized cancer. Later PET scan showed a likelihood of lung cancer (tumor found), abnormalities in bones/vertebrae, and evidence of cancer in the abdominal lining; also a spot on the liver. An abdominal biopsy was done Friday; results this week on type of cells and in two weeks on whether it’s a genetic mutation. Lung cancer in non-smokers is rare so it might (hopefully) be genetic mutation that is treated w/ pill rather than chemo chemical cocktail. We are hopeful; pulling together and having faith, as we are fortunate enough do in times like these.  It is a very trying time for Roberta and Norman; she is not feeling well.  And it is a very sad time for the rest of us. Below is a photo of us taken in May of 2010 & our son, November 2005.

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